10 Things I Would Tell My Younger Self

Hey:) hope you are having a good day so far! I asked for blog post suggestions a while back on my instagram story and have been sitting on a few ideas to publish as future entries and today one of those gets to see the light of day. I have learned a lot in my 20 years of life. I know I have a whole lot of time ahead of me but these past 2 decades have taught me so many lessons; some of which I could have avoided with some advice from my future self. There are parts of my past I reflect upon and feel proud, content, and happy. Others, I physically cringe. That is called growth! Today I will be sharing 10 Things I Would Tell My Younger Self. 10 things that have the power to help me appreciate my past and embrace my future. I hope that you can relate to at least one word that I have to say and realize how awesome and special you and the life you have the pleasure of living are! Enjoy!

1. Take life less seriously.

I feel like this one does not need much explanation. But, I clearly need one. Life is supposed to be fun, exciting, whimsical, and all over the place. So put a smile on your face and do it for the plot! It’s not that deep and trying to control your life by taking things too seriously gets you nowhere....so let’s laugh at life, dance around, sing super loud and just live.

2. Everyone is so caught up in their own lives that your insecurities are beyond insignificant and no one notices or cares!

To me, my insecurities seem like blaring flashing warnings that stop passers by to stop and stare. I was always insecure about my forehead and nose being too big and acne growing up and to this day but overtime I realized that it doesn’t matter! Once you realize everyone else is wondering if you are stopping and staring at them, you are off the hook! If someone is commenting on or pointing out your insecurities, well then they suck and lack the confidence we are all trying to find. So accept who you are, stand a little taller and relax. No one is looking at that underground pimple on your chin that showed up this morning, or how tall you are, or if your nails are done, or if your roots are grown out. I promise.

3. Don’t let temporary characters overstay their welcome in your life.

This is a big big lesson for me that I am still learning. The people in your life that are meant to be there will stay because they want to. Because they care about you, love you and want to be there no matter what. Do not beg someone to stay, to care, to be there if they do not want to be there. There are so many temporary characters that are going to come and go throughout our lives and we have to let them. Holding on to them compromises our growth, self respect and creates a world of hurt. Some people are not meant to stick around and that is painful but they are doing you a favor by leaving. It may not feel like that at first but trust me it will get easier!

4. Emotions and vulnerability are your power. Use them!

I cry a lot; happy, sad, anxious, it doesn't matter there will be tears. Crying is cool. It’s not dramatic, childish, or weak. Expression and connection are what make us human. Embrace that. Feel deeply, love fearlessly and be authentic and vulnerable even when it is hard. A good cry or confiding in someone close to you is so freeing. I feel physically lighter after I cry. I rid myself of the fear and sadness and I do not apologize for it. And neither should you. I used to feel embarrassed by my tears but half the time it is a true testament of how deeply I care. That is so special and something I should celebrate not hide. So let’s cry more! Be emotional!

5. Ask for help even when it is scary and seems impossible.

This is one of the hardest things for me. I hate asking for help. So much. But when I do I feel so much better. Letting other people support you when you need them does not make you weak, it makes you stronger! Isolating yourself; just you and your problems…that makes you weak. So be brave because we are not meant to go through life all alone. Whether life is easy at the moment or so so hard we all need help so ask for it!

6. Prioritize yourself. Be selfish when it matters because you are your #1 priority.

You are your own best friend, advocate, cheerleader, motivator and priority always. When you don’t feel like you have anyone else (which is false) you have you! Don’t let anything come between your relationship with yourself. If that means saying no, staying in, etc. Do it. Be selfish. You owe it to yourself to ensure that you are living the best possible life because you only get one:)

7. Stop paying attention to what everyone else is doing. Put your time, energy and attention into things that suit YOU. 

Life is too short to not be yourself. Just because something is trending, or your friends do it, or the internet says so, don’t do anything that compromises who you are. Wear what you want, date who you want, be whoever you want to be as long as it is you. Invest your efforts in people that you don’t have to change parts of you for. They should accept you the way you shine for yourself. Anything less isn’t worth the trouble.

8. Being weird is cool and everyone else is weird too. Trust me.

I feel like this one doesn’t need much explaining. I was a theater kid for 8 years, former Survivor super fan, current geography and trivia nerd, I wear an abnormal amount of colorful clothing and I will eat breakfast foods for every meal. We are all a little weird the difference is how you spin it. Embrace the parts of you that make you YOU be comfortable in your skin and own every part of you.

9. Success and worth are entirely subjective and look different for everyone.

I used to associate my self worth with my grades, appearance, and approval from my peers. It was exhausting and unrelenting as I was never satisfied with my “achievements.” The standard of perfection I set for myself was doomed from the start and it took me a while to realize that. Perfectionism and people pleasing make for an all consuming combo that make life kind of suck. Once I started to notice my confidence rise in relation to feeling fulfilled by non-material things, experiences, and relationships, I felt so good. I stopped comparing myself to those around me and focused more on rewriting my perception of success. Major takeaway: An A- won’t kill you but trying to be perfect will.

10. If you are stuck on a gear, you can’t evolve, grow and change so keep moving!

Just like those temporary characters, chapters in our life are meant to come to an end. It can be hard to move on, forward, any direction that isn’t backwards really but it gets easier. If you move a little each day, soon enough you will be so far forward you won’t know what it felt like to be stuck before. Grow, change, and become the version of yourself you have always wanted to be. Do it for you and the amazing life you get to live:)